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*Herpes*

   Ask Erika,
   I'm 18 & I have never (technically) had sex with anyone. I have had oral sex with one individual & I have used my hand to stimulate the clitoris of one other individual.
  
   I know my oral sex partner was clean, she has had several checkups since then. I am not sure about the second partner, but STDs aren't generally contracted through the hands.
  
   My concern: I have small bumps at the base of my penis. The bumps have been there for a long time, but I can't remember how long.  Naturally I'm concerned.
  
   I have seen pictures of genital warts & they don't look like what  I've seen in pictures. They don't itch, they don't burn, they don't  hurt & they aren't rough or dry. *Is there anything that would  explain these symptoms, besides an STD?*
  
   I have never been tested before, I don't really know how it's done. (I figure it's probably a urine sample.) How much do STD tests cost?  Please reply soon. This whole situation has become quite depressing for me. My sex life could be over before it has even begun.
   -Rick
  
   Dear Rick,
   Thank you for your question. You are right--your risk of contracting an infection through manual stimulation of a woman's clitoris is very, very low b/c of the nature of the skin on the hands and the fact that you would then have to re-transfer the infection to your penis. It is more likely that an infection will be transmitted through oral sex.
  
   Regarding your concern about the bumps on your penis, it is possible that those bumps may just be hair follicles. Sometimes hair follicles on the penis appear as raised bumps just like you describe--painless, smooth, etc. However, if you are concerned for any reason, which it sounds like you are, I would recommend going to a clinician to get them checked out. Look in the phone book where you live to find the number for the county clinic or call Planned Parenthood at 1-800-230-PLAN to get information about where to go in your area for
   a check-up. You could also go to your family doctor or primary care physician. How much it will cost depends on where you go and what you have done. In your case, they will probably just examine the bumps to see if they are HPV. They may offer you testing for other infections as well.
  
   To get more information, you can also call the National HPV Hotline toll free at: (877) 478-5868.
  
   Finally, remember, whatever the results are, no one's sex life has to end b/c they have an infection. People continue to be sexual beings and have sexual feelings even when they have an infection. These are issues that you can discuss with your clinician, current and future partners, and counselors (ask about this on the HPV hotline). With communication, honesty, and a few adjustments and precautions, it is certainly possible to continue sexual activity.
  
   Good luck and thank you for your question.
   Erika Pluhar
  
   This tip was written by Erika Pluhar Ph.D. (c)

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____________

The Founder: "Alex" Caroline Robboy, LCSW, QSW, CAS

Ms. Robboy is the Founder and Chief Executive Officer of The Center for Growth Inc and How To Have Good Sex Inc.  Alex practices marriage and family therapy and sex therapy, and also conducts periodic seminars about human sexuality throughout the northeastern United States.

Ms. Robboy graduated from the University of Pennsylvania where she earned a Masters degree in Social Work, a Certificate of Advanced Studies in Human Sexuality Education and a Post-Masters Certificate in Marriage Counseling & Sex Therapy. Through the American Board of Sexology, she is a board certified sexologist and through the American Association of Sex Educators Counselors and Therapists a certified sex therapist.  Additionally, she is a licensed clinical social worker and a member of the American Board of Marriage and Family Therapy.

 

  Our Philosophy sex is like dancing, it changes every time. It depends on culture, atmosphere and mood. Sometimes it is done alone, with a partner or in a group. It can be fast and hard or slow and soft. Sex is a combination of non-verbal negotiation and verbal cues: a scream, a twitch of the toes, or a flush of the face. There is no one 'right' way to move, only what feels good to all those involved. 
     The purpose of this site is to share information. Thus, if you have any ideas, thoughts or information that you believe others might benefit from, please e-mail your tip to alex@howtohavegoodsex.com and I  will be sure to include it on either our weekly newsletter or here on the actual website. 
                                                                                    

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